You might be an Angel of Death if...

Black is the only color in your wardrobe...
You smile and people STILL run in fear...
Everyone you encounter turns black & blue...
A simple glance is taken as an evil glare...
Your Saturday night is spent hanging behind Grandma Tilley's tombstone...
You check your hair in the reflection of the blade of your knife...
Everyone is jealous of your mad skills...
Your beauty regime consists of lightening your face and deadening your eyes...
You're unblockable because you're just too damn slick...
You see "red" whenever you see pink...

You own a pair of silver hot pants...
You fantasize about having a sushi roll named after you...
You find yourself apologizing to your opponent for being so badass...
Violence makes you giggle like a school girl...
You can clear a dance floor with your mad booty shaking skills...
Everything in your closet shows off your amazing cleavage...
You make special effort to do something that would require you to get a spanking from every girl on your team...
You find yourself yelling, "FAST AND HARD!!! HUAAHH!!" for no apparent reason...
Every time you walk into a social event everyone starts screaming with excitement...
Everyone likes you...

You actually start wearing some pink outside derby functions...
You party hard and skate even harder...
You can't afford good wheels and suddenly three sets appear...
Your teammates remind you that they are so glad you are on THEIR team because you are a force to be reckoned with...
You have made out with most of your teammates and can identify them by a picture of their boobs...
The time between periods at a bout = smoke break...
When you hit the rink and it's all about the pink...
You get spankings as a reward instead of a punishment...
You don't play dirty because you know you can win for REAL...
You know at the end of a game, win or lose, it's CARBOMBS for all...

Every time you get excited about something you yell, "KILL KILL KILL!"...
You break a bone but keep on playing...
More than half of your wardrobe is camo...
You've found yourself shopping for team gear in the little boys' section...
You can actually understand what the Unabobber says...
Anytime anyone asks you if you are ready you scream "Always Ready!"...
You pronounce the word "right" as "rot", "tonight" as "tonot" and "ice" as "oss"...
You do your Christmas shopping at the Army Surplus store...
You come to practice with a hangover on a regular basis...
You are a super hot babe with awesome derby skillz!...